Respect is a way of being towards something or someone. You can show respect to objects, times and people, teams, businesses, or products and of course not forgetting perhaps the most important yourself
Let’s 1st look at the definition of the word and where it originates from
Definition of respect: to feel or show admiration for, to regard as being worthy of admiration because you believe they have good ideas and good qualities. You have a high opinion of someone or something. An interpretation from the mid 16thC is “treat with deferential regard or esteem, regard with some degree of reverence”
A point to make at this point is you can have respect for something or someone and not agree with them or it. You can have respect for someone and not like them, the feelings do not have to be mutually positive.
The word respect comes from the Latin ‘respectere’ which means ‘to look back at’ ‘regard’ ‘consider’.
Therefore, respect involves devoting time and energy to seeing something clearly, not through a filter of one’s interpretations, biases, assumptions, and judgements. Which of course then links to how you can respect something or someone and not agree, you put the emotional context aside and take an objective view of the subject
Respect involves noticing and listening and being willing to look at something or someone again, rather than rely on 1st impressions and of course 1st impressions count on your ability to do that until you know about putting your biases aside
Respect is a relation between a subject and an object in which the subject responds to the object from a certain perspective.
A simple fact:
A person who respects something perceives it differently from someone who does not.
Respect is the acknowledgement of the power of something other than yourself to demand, command or make claims on your:
• Attention – give time and energy, listening and understanding
• Deference – consideration, not putting yourself first
• Valuing – attaching worth or value to something or someone
• Conduct – taking appropriate behaviour
Respect of Someone
Respect involves deference, in the most basic sense of the word; self-absorption and egocentric concerns give way.
You demonstrate respect for others by:
• Having regard for people’s feelings
• Accepting and celebrating difference
• Taking notice of people
• Caring for others
• Listening to and valuing other peoples’ opinions
• Treating others with courtesy and dignity
• Avoiding violation of and interference in another’s rights
• Never intentionally ridiculing or embarrassing others
• Not needing to be right all the time
• Affirming them
Is Respect Due to all or does it need to be Earnt?
• Some argue that respect is something that must be earned.
• Others argue that respect is due to all regardless.
• Some say that people are not inherently worthy of respect, they must act in such a way as to deserve it.
• Some say that all people regardless of anything other than being human are deserving of respect.
What it does mean is that we all perceive respect and what it means from our own viewpoint and position, ultimately to disrespect yourself or anyone else is a slippery slope to something else contempt, disdain, derision, mockery, and ridicule spring to mind.
We will all have our biases & choice as to what we respect in life both someone and something, and it will be different from one to another and there will be general commonalities I am sure if we studied the subject in enough detail to do a huge survey
This means that respect can be accorded to people in differing amounts, depending on how much respect they have earned or have the right to claim.
People tend to accord varying amounts of respect to people based on several different factors.
Here are some that factor in:
• Financial resources
• Experience, expertise, or talent, their knowledge
• Family background, their bloodline or their heritage, their class
• Position, their seniority or their title
• Sex, race, disability, sexuality
• Admiration of a particular way of being
The list can clearly be longer, and I would ask you to think about what you respect as it will affect your actions towards others and objects and yourself
Respect yourself before all others as without you respecting you what happens?
• You are devalued
• You do not achieve what you can
• You are influenced by others who may not have your best interests at heart
• You allow yourself to say yes when no is the answer
• You remain in jobs that do not serve
• You remain in relationships that do not serve
• You do ‘things’ that are not respecting of you – sex, lies, colluding with wrong
What we choose to respect is absolutely our choice and with the right to choose as an individual comes the responsibility to acknowledge that others have the right to choose as well.
Now, what does that mean if you are working with others? It means that a conversation and agreement need to be made so that boundaries are not trampled all over and disrespect is shown unintentionally
• What name do you wish to be called?
• How close do you wish people to be to you?
• How do you wish people to talk to you?
• What do you wish to be respected for?
They are a few thoughts to kick start a thought process and of course, it is much deeper than that and in a working environment there is so much more
• Age in the past has demanded respect – does it today?
• Years of service have in the past demanded respect – do they today?
• Titles have in the past been used to show respect – is it the same today?
• Positions have in the past wielded power – do they today?
Things have changed and are changing, and the change is helped when the conversations are had before a problem ensues – proactivity V reactivity is the name of the game
If you feel disrespected look at what you can do it about, what conversation do you need to have and alternatively if you feel respected tell the person, give them kudos for their action and respect them
It is important to note that it is not simply actions that matter for respect; it is the attitudes and value priorities that lie behind the actions that are morally most significant.
Respect of Something
I wonder how often respecting something is discussed or written about? Not as often as respecting someone I expect
There is a big place in life of respecting something and what that means
We can respect or not:
• An object – phone TV, car, oven, a pair of shoes
• An environment – a home, a culture within a business
• The environment – the world, nature, plastic usage and disposal
• A job – adhering to the company ‘rules’, speaking well of your employer
• A brand – Apple, Nike, Audi
• A product – iPhone, Remarkable
• A company – Amazon, Marks & Spencer
• An idea – the world is round, the 80/20 principle
• A book – Eat That Frog, Stress the Reality
Once again there are many more that can be added to the list and it is a start, respecting things is as important in many ways as respecting humans, showing respect to something has benefits as well
• Things last longer
• Loyalty can be rewarded
• Discounts are achieved
• Money can be saved
• Negotiation can take place
• Learning takes place
• Knowledge is gained
The list can clearly be longer, and I would ask you to think about what you respect as it will affect your actions towards things and once again yourself and very possibly your bank balance
The Value of Things
All things have a price, and the very purpose of a price is to establish comparative value. Some people will respect things that are more costly than others, some people will respect things that are less costly.
Some people will respect things they have paid for and not respect anything that someone else has paid for
Some people will respect things more that they have not paid for and less the things they have paid for
There is no right or wrong there is a market for all, and respect is an absolute moving spectrum – one size does not fit all things and all humans